Where is the Mango Princess? ePUB – Moncler2018.co

Where is the Mango Princess is a truly touching but tragic account of Traumatic Brian Injury TBI and its impact on a family As much as I respect Anne Lamont, I wonder at her comment, at least as it appears on the book cover blurb, that this is a story of recovery What exactly has been recovered And how redemptive has this been in the lives of Cathy Crimmins and her husband Alan Surely Cathy has had to address her once hands off approach to marriage and has chosen to become a truly sacrificial wife, in the process shedding much of the enlightened independence she had so highly prized In this way, she has somehow backed into a richer covenantal attitude to her husband reflected in the traditional vows she, no doubt, took She is living much for him, even when he does not appreciate it, realize it, or have as much to offer in return The picture is sad but beautiful, and highly instructive Her world is a far blessed place as a result of her response to this tragedy And yet, has she recovered What exactly did she lose and what does she have back now Her wellness Her humanity Maybe it is his that is recovered I am not sure Because her beautiful story remains largely fruitless for her life After much struggle, she has learned to cope Her story, filled with potential power, is ultimately a lovely tragedy This is instructive to anyone who might seek to care for someone who has suffered TBI and to their family I have ministered to a few, and wish I had read in advance the Mango Princess particularly through the lens of chapter 5 of Edward Welch s Blame it on the Brain I think of one person in particular Looking back I realize neither he nor I coped with the results of his injury adequately I did not really understand the ways his injury legitimately impacted her, because it was clear that he was being so willfully selfish and hurtful And he in turn wanted to blame his sin completely on his injury The big issue I wish I had seen better in the past his TBI did create some very significant hidden weaknesses that needed to be recognized and accounted for in trying to help his deal with his struggles Families in these circumstances face special heart obstacles, as Crimmins so thoughtfully illustrates Like Alan, the victims very often heal outwardly in a short time, causing the families frustration at not seeing a similar recovery in their mental, emotional and behavioral issues He is walking again he is talking again his wound is healed up he looks all better so why can t he start acting like he used to He s not a vegetable, and he can seem like his old self sometimes, so why does he have to acts so impulsive or socially inappropriate Why is his sense of humor so weird Why doesn t he respond to things the way we used to reasoning, prayer And if so, why can t they just do some surgery or give him a pill that will fix him The real physical impact of the injury needs to be understood if the mundane duties of living are to be carried forward, and if the heart of the person and his family and friends are to be challenged to greater spiritual maturity Perhaps the hardest thing to grapple with something Crimmins seems to miss is the truth that the best explanation of post injury behavior is pre injury character See Ed Welch, p 90 Welch suggests the difficult but potentially liberating truth that the injury can act as truth serum to its victims It can be deeply discouraging, but it also can be redemptively potent as people gain open access to what was truly in the person s heart all along TBI calls for special care and love A superficial attitude by loved ones can unwittingly contribute to the complex problems Crimmins provides a very thoughtful, sensitive, moving if somewhat unsatisfying account of her own deep experience. tip however cleverly written, do not read a memoir about caring for someone rehabilitating from traumatic brain injury when you are going to sleep, if you want to sleep and not panic all night about losing everyone you love and impermanency in general.this might win for book most intertwined with my life, in geography, characters, and theme cameos from dmitri of dmitri s restaurant, the lombard swim club, philadelphia school, penn law school, magee and magee riverfront, west philly indian restaurants, presumably the riverview movie theater, former city paper editor bruce schimmel making crude comments, cape may, montgomery mccracken, and first union bank who really should have been sued mercilessly for that pretextual layoff i won t lay out the thematic connections sigh. I loved this book It s the story of a man who suffers a traumatic brain injury, as told from his wife s point of view The book does such a great job of telling the family s story, what it s like to live with someone who has become a completly different person I think a lot of times the focus is on the person coming out of the coma but people often don t realize that the person doesn t just wake up fine and back to normal This book does a really good job of describing the rehab process and the impact of brain injury on the whole family. I have a fascination with books that document how people cope with tragedy and awful events in their lives This is one of those books The synopsis of the book and other reviews here provide the details of the awful events in this book that occurred in 1996, so I won t dwell on that TBI is some bad stuff to deal with, certainly for the person who has it, but perhaps even so for the caregiver And when the person with TBI is your husband, as it is in this book, you realize that the person you are caring for really isn t the person you married Even though Alan Forman, an attorney and highly intelligent and educated person, recovers much function after intensive therapy, he is never the same in so many ways After all the work and progress, he can function, but never really independently He is a different person and one who is difficult to deal with year after year It is a tragedy that never ends.This book is well written and informative and sad And made sadder for me because after finishing the book, I did a search on the author to see if I could find out what happened since she wrote this book in 2000 I found out that the author and her husband divorced very common in TBI cases and the author died in 2009 from infection resulting from routine ankle surgery This was almost the saddest part of all An ignoble end to this family tragedy. It is crass to call a personal account like this and call it a page turner but it was truly that a page turner The author s retelling of her husband s journey through TBI and the toll it took on her family is about so much than brain injury it s about the heartlessness of healthcare providers, the experience of sudden downward turns in fortune, how the best parents can inadvertently create a terrible home environment for their child, what it is like to have caregiving thrust upon you, and what life is for a newly disabled and their families.Amazingly, Crimmins conveys all of this without taking herself too seriously And can anyone in a situation like this be accused of taking it too seriously The person who recommended this book to me said it was hilarious I don t think it was close to that but the humorous quips in this were perfect not too dark, just a way to show how ludicrous and surreal it can be to lose someone to a condition like this.Read this book it will give you a reality check and convey how life can change on you without making you recoil from its bite If you are curious about TBI itself the research must have come a long way since it was first published, but the experiential and human side of it is still than worth the read. I hated this book It s badly written, and focuses on whining about health care than it does on TBI and its effects The author lacks any sympathy for anyone else, yet she expects readers to feel sorry for her plight I only feel sorry for her daughter, having to live with a TBI father and a horrible mother incapable of dealing with anything with level headedness and grace. Humorist Cathy Crimmins Has Written A Deeply Personal, Wrenching, And Often Hilarious Account Of The Effects Of Traumatic Brain Injury, Not Only On The Victim, In This Case Her Husband, But On The FamilyWhen Her Husband Alan Is Injured In A Speedboat Accident, Cathy Crimmins Reluctantly Assumes The Role Of Caregiver And Learns To Cope With The Person He Has Become No Longer The Man Who Loved Obscure Japanese Cinema And Wry Humor, Crimmins Husband Has Emerged From The Accident A Childlike And Unpredictable Replica Of His Former Self With A Short Attention Span And A Penchant For Inane Cartoons Where Is The Mango Princessis A Breathtaking Account That Explores The Very Nature Of Personality And The Complexities Of The Heart Interesting, and doubly so for the sense of limbo that prevails The book was published in 2000, but much of it was written earlier, when her husband was just three or so years out and still adjusting so it s hard to know how much he improved, or has improved, since then, or what lasting effects it had on the people around him.The author died in 2009 following complications from surgery, but some quick poking on the internet leads me to believe that view spoiler she and her husband divorced at some point in the nine years following the book s publication hide spoiler I cannot rate this book higher than a two.Having a spouse w a newly acquired TBI two months prior to reading this and ironically a 7 year old daughter, I can relate to the accident and the rehabilitation and the family make up, but I cannot relate to the author and her family s lifestyle I found myself amazed in the similarities to her spouse s early recovery and my own husband s, though the later half of the book had me rolling my eyes far too often at the obvious privileged lifestyle these people led I also cannot feel any hope coming out of this book Only martyrdom and unhappiness.And to find out that their marriage ultimately fell into the 75% of all couples after TBI which occurred after this book was published and so is not part of the memoir I wonder what the point wasNot a book AT ALL for new caregivers of spouses w TBI. Horrifying Hopeful Heartbreaking.Cathy Crimmins writes a painful account of a moment when her life changed completely In a matter of minutes Cathy loses the husband she knew and loved to a stranger with Traumatic Brain Injury She speaks about how difficult it is to be a caregiver, especially when it does not come naturally to you In one of the most shocking scenes she describes a moment when she finally can t take it any and screams at her husband I will kill you in front of their 7 year old daughter Later that night as she steps out of the shower she discovers that her husband has left her a note on the mirror Help me I have TBI That s the hard part about this book Cathy loves her husband, but that person is gone The new Al is verbally abusive, spends money recklessly, and is not above kicking their dog and child However, Cathy knows that these irrational moments are caused by the brain injury and in some excruciating and longed for moments she sees the old Alan she was married to in the new Al Most saddening of all is that Al knows that he has changed and it is affecting his family, but he doesn t know how much Cathy describes how for all intents and purposes Al is a success He s alive and he s highly functional She knows she should feel lucky, and she does, but she also doesn t Definitely a fascinating and honest read, but not for those looking for something with an easy resolution.